Damn Footman, DAMN!!! I'm speechless seriously lol...you wrote it so well...You sure you are not a writer lol!!
I'll take that as a compliment! And no, I'm not a professional writer, or even amateur for that matter- other than this story.
[Note- the following lengthy diatribe does not necessarily have much to do directly with masturbation- but does deal with the story]
Here's the comments from another member of that forum who read the story: (I believe that they're very accurate)
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1. the fantasy/daydream is not about a humiliated husband. While certainly there are some elements that can be interpreted that way in addition to some self-deprecating remarks, the possibility of a truly degraded/humiliated husband fantasy was considerably avoided by presenting the wife as an ex-wife.
2. the fantasy/daydream is not about group sex either although the fantasy reads as a gangbang/group sex party. The important pieces are that there are a great number of fantastically build and good-looking men at the place and all of them are fascinated by her body, which they use for their own pleasure; the second one is that any significant bonding between these men and ex-wife are prevented by her being in a zombie-like state; and third, she can climax just by anybody barely touching her genitals.
3. this fantasy/daydream is basically about breaking the wife in; forcing her to realize her own beauty and full sexual potential by being subjected to a faceless crowd of men who provoke her body to respond to sexual stimuli beyond the control of her mind and will. Eventually she’s able to enjoy everything.
In very simple words the author is saying: I wish you can see how beautiful you are and you’d understand why I’m always horny around you. I’d fu'ck you all the time if I can just remove whatever is blocking your full sexual potential. When I fu'ck you I want you to respond with lust and orgasms; be the freak in the bed. I love you and respect you too much to do anything that would hurt your feelings, but sometimes I wish one of your old boyfriends or some faceless dude broke you in before I met you.
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This particular statement is amazingly interesting: "...but sometimes I wish one of your old boyfriends or some faceless dude broke you in before I met you." Interesting because,, even though we had agreed not to share too many details of our sex lives with each other after we became engaged, because we had been very close platonic friends, I was aware of some of her sexual past.
This real woman, who I eventually married, I considered basically quite and conservative, so two things about her preious sex life profoundly impacted me:
- I knew that she had taken an overnight trip with one of her college professors (no other details).
- But most importantly, before we started dating, she had been engaged to a controlling, mucle-bound, photography-loving guy who had a bad temper, and who eventually abused her physically and emotionally- and my guess is sexually. I was, at the same time, both apalled and titallated by what I surmised might have happened between them- both consenual and non-consenual.
As I mentioned, he liked photography. I was amazed that, although he abused her badly, she actually had kept one of his photographs. Almost like the captive falling in love with her captor. This further blurred the line for me wondering what she experienced and whether she liked it or not. I only saw one photo that he had taken of her- and it was very sexy- it was a photo of her in her bikini, still wet from just getting out of the water, smiling broadly and leaning up a against a wood fence by a walkway. This, from a quite conservative girl who, even during our enegagement would never wear a bikini or let me photograph her in any way. This could have been completely innocent, but yet I was also aware that some guys get really obsessed with photography. I wondered how many photos of her he had; whether he had kept them all after they broke up; and of course whether he had any nude photos of her- taken with or with out her blessing.
Because of his size, physical strength and temper I wondered whether the line from making love had ever crossed into rape, or whether she had been made to do things against her will, particularly things that she refused to do with me: anal sex, oral sex, bondage. I knew full well that it could just have been her basic desire NOT to do these things, but her quick and strong reaction to even the suggestion of them made me wonder. I couldn't help but think that, at least several times that things had gone too far or gone wrong for her, and she unable to defend herself.
It was that wondering that at times lead to intense fantasies of what might have happened, both with the photography (everything from lots of photos at the beach like I described, to long nude photography sessions). The one photograph from the beach (mentioned previously) gave me a raging erection- I could only imagine what it did for him, especially assuming that that was only one of many photos taken that day. I can easily imagine that, no matter what she desired, that after a day like that, nothing would stop him from taking her.
So for many years, I was torn between being terribly afraid of what had happened to her and feeling that this guy had ruined many aspects of sex for me, yet getting excited by the fantasies of the very same things.
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As far as this thread is concerned, these two comments rang true for me, and seemed to be a part of my fantasy feelings:
By softstroke: "I think it's all about her sexuality - I like the idea of her having powerful urges and wanting to satisfy them, and a little humiliation as I watch a much bigger man satisfy her cravings is arousing..."
By happystroker: "When a woman takes her own partners, on her own terms, something beautiful happens. It can be a challenge, it does not have to be a humiliation. For myself, I've found that as much as a woman might love me, and as great sex as she might have, she will eventually want or need to get fucked a lot and hard by a real stud. And I love to listen to her story, or her moans and cries, and later put my tongue into her swollen pussy and taste the pleasure she just had, and feel new and gentle pleasure rippling through her body."